After Thoughts

I felt today I should take a moment to reflect on Thanksgiving, and how we celebrated. There were several things that went very well. We had our little thankfulness cards, except this time we did it a little different. Instead of cutting out a bajillion leaves, I printed some tags I found online. We went for a walk and found some lovely branches, one of wich we used to hang our tags on, tied with ribbon. It turned out very simple and pretty. We took things at a nice slow pace yet, for the first time ever, I finally got the turkey cooked RIGHT ON TIME (a small miracle I asure you). We walked across the street to the park a couple of times to let the children release all their energy. Also, we had some friends over, along with their two small children, for dessert ( we didn't eat the children , of course. We had pie).
There were some things I would like to do better next year. I would like to invite people sooner. I also would like to look earlier for some tastier squash to grow.
We had a wonderful time. It's funny to see how things change as the kids get older.

Give Thanks

Well, here it is the Monday before Thanksgiving, so much to do. Yet, I think it is good for me to sit down and consider the reason I enjoy Thanksgiving so much. It is so important to instill in the children to Whom are we thankful and for what. To help them see that it is so much bigger than just ourselves. Yet, I love to make a huge feast with more than enough for us and intended and extra guests. How much fun it is for the kids to anticipate it for a couple of weeks. I love to make the holidays last for more than 1 or 2 days. I want them to last weeks. It allows me to take it slower, to be more intentional in creating traditions and memories daily or weekly. It also allows me to reflect and think about why we do what we do, and what it means. So, I am going to take a little time to write what I am thankful to my Heavenly Father for:

• that I know Jesus
• for my wonderful, loving husband Andrew
• for my awesome children
• for all G-d has taught me
• the ability to homeschool
• the chance to care for my little niece
• my mother , father, and siblings
• my home
• and so very much more!

It gives me energy to serve those who need me when I think about what a blessing they are.

The Homeschool Game

My husband coined this phrase this weekend. I have utterly been freaking out about all that needs to happen under my direction now. So, he let me know that it could possibly be the "homeschool" game that was getting me upset. Well, I had to pause and admit that, I think, indeed he is right. So many issues to iron out. So many things to do and keep track of. So many possibilities to think about. I just had to stop. So, I calmed down and thought about what was actually possible right now. What is beneficial about the things I can do right now. Ultimately, what has God put on my heart to care for right now. I think things will be awesome. I don't know what the future holds, but I know someone who is already there.

Where to Turn

Oh, today I feel full of negative emotions. Frustration is front and center. I am really tired of this feeling today. I love my family, and I do find great joy and fulfillment in serving them. But oh, I do get weary at times. I am tired of enforcing rules. The screaming and fighting is unbearable. I am tired of controlling every situation. I don't know how I am going to get over this feeling this time ( or through it, rather). I shall somehow, though. Somehow, the Lord comes with a balm to ease it; so it passes. I am just trying to make it till that time comes. Sometimes I just want to be whisked away from my troubles. I know I could not be happy if I was, though. I have a tendency to conquer instead of letting go. I suppose I should stop looking in the mirror and start looking around at these precious people around me. The fights continue. Those people don't always act as precious as they are, unfortunately. I know we all are that way, at times. I fear I am the worst one. How can I lead my children if I am so full of sin and so very depleted. I pray, but I am fearful in waiting on God's time for my relief. I know it will come and I am comforted in that. Again I will sink to my knees for the forgiveness I so desperately need, from my children and my God. I think something different for lunch may save the day.
P.S. It's amazing how a small hand with a bunch of wildflowers aimed at you can brighten your day. The Lord has blessed me with wonderful children who care about their mommy, even when she is a bit prickly. He has shown me today that they do respond to what I try to teach them.